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Name: modgurl
Location: Singapore

New mom. New woman. Born in Singapore. Raised in the World Wide Web.
Monday, February 01, 2010 @ 12:41 pm

Dear Blogger,

My father has been discharged for almost a week now, but he'll be back at SGH to insert the dialysis tube somewhere near his abdomen (I don't know what it's called) on Thursday. Things are going to be different from now on.

The last few weeks had been very emotionally stressful. Nevertheless, all of us has reached a common understanding and agreement. Not everyone is happy with it (especially my mother), but the important thing is that an agreement has been made.

We decided that the best option for my father right now is to have him move to our home for his peritoneal dialysis. I can care for him in the day and my mother will do so when she returns from work. With him moving to our home, it cuts down a lot of the commuting. It isn't easy to commute either with Sarah tagging along.

The move itself was a big challenge. My mother had flatly refused this proposal when we first mentioned it. She gave all sorts of reasons why but only God knows the real reasons. She gave in when my second brother talked her into doing it. He has also promised to contribute financially to the dialysis regularly despite his low wages. He's a good person. Can't say the same for his older brother.

Ipy and I are preparing one of the bedrooms for my parents. Ipy had just bought a queen-sized bed for them. We are still considering furniture layout options because the bedroom isn't as big as we thought. Moving about my father in his wheelchair in the room will be quite a challenge.

Automated peritoneal dialysis at home (Source: http://cnydc.com/dialysis.html)

As I'm writing this, my mother is still not fully committed to the idea of them moving into our house. I really don't want to start another discussion aka argument about this because we've been doing that for almost 3 weeks already. I pray to God that she opens up her heart, mind and soul that what we are doing is the best for my father. For this plan to work, we need her fullest support.

The fact that I've to live with my mother again is secondary. The thought has occurred to me several times and Ipy and I have joked about how stressful it will be for me to be under the same roof with my mom. I just have to realign my focus to my father's health care whenever the thought pops into my mind.

Financially, I'm trying not to pin all of my hopes on subsidies. NKF's subsidy application is very strict. I don't understand why it should be when it had made a big, bad mistake on donor's funds a few years ago. I still think NKF owes it to the public to provide us with support when we need it.

With my father's dialysis about to take effect, our finance is going to be tight. I am making double effort to be conscientious when spending money. I've even reminded Ipy not to spend unnecessarily, even to the extend of skipping buying a birthday present for me this year.

Things may look rough on the surface, but God knows that things will turn out well in the end. This is after all, one of His challenges to my family and I. So, no need to argue and just accept the challenge.

More information on peritoneal dialysis here via NKF Singapore.

Sincerely,
modgurl.

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