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who am i

Name: modgurl
Location: Singapore

New mom. New woman. Born in Singapore. Raised in the World Wide Web.
Thursday, April 23, 2009 @ 12:08 am

Dear Blogger,

I have been sick for over a week with a persistent cough. It might just be some common cough to some people, but what I'm going through right now has caused me 3 trips to the GP, sleepless nights, on-off fevers and irregular breathing.

The first trip to the GP was very disappointing because the doctor didn't even prescribe me any cough medicine for fear of contractions to the baby. After 2 days of worsening coughing, I went back. This time, the doctor prescribed the cough syrup with addition medicine to unblock my airways. I wasn't able to breathe properly.

3 days later, I was at the GP again. I've finished all the medication but my cough hasn't subsided. I was prescribed antibiotics this time round. The doctor suspected that I may be infected with a virus in my airways.

I thought, whatever man. Anything to rid me of this cough. The coughing hasn't been easy on my respiratory system, let alone the baby. God knows how the baby is doing with all that coughing in my system.

But do you know what is worse than the pain and the worry? The fact that he is not here for me. It's one thing to leave a 6-month pregnant wife on her own for a few weeks, it's another to leave a 6-month pregnant wife who is SICK on her own for a few weeks!

Sometimes I really wonder if I'm really cared. If I'm really loved. It's always these moments when I am so vulnerable, so badly in need of a human love, that I learn the bitter truth that I can never depend on anybody else. Not even my husband.

My tears were in vain.

Sincerely,
modgurl.

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