posts are personal. open-mindedness is essential.
who am i

Name: modgurl
Location: Singapore

New mom. New woman. Born in Singapore. Raised in the World Wide Web.
Sunday, November 30, 2008 @ 11:04 pm

Dear Blogger,

Nobody and nothing should make the bride unhappy on her wedding day. Just like nobody or nothing should make anybody cry on his/her birthday. But that was what happened on our wedding.

A few minutes just after my arrival, my sister-in-law (unfortunately) snatched away all the menu cards on the table, right in front of me and my guests. I didn't know what was going on but when I asked her, she said something irrational and then snubbed me!

The menu card printed in gold paper

I was so thrown off by her behaviour that I became very upset. All these right before the solemnisation! Even under those thick makeup, one can see how pissed I looked. I didn't even bother to hide the anger. Why should I???

I later found out that she pulled down the reception poster and took away the wedding album from my sister. That made me even more upset that I swear to God, I just wanted to walk out of the my own wedding.

The wedding reception poster right next to the reception table where the guest book and wedding album were

You don't go around people's weddings and take away elements just because you don't like them. So what if you're family?! You just don't do that! That's just rude and disrespectful.

Firstly, this wedding was solely planned, paid for and executed by the bride and groom. Secondly, she came late! She's the sister of the groom and she came later than most of the other guests! So what right did she have to do that???

Right after the solemnisation, I made my feelings known to Ipy while our stylists updated our look in the manager's office. He had to know what his sister did. This wasn't just his event. It was our event! I had guests asking for those menu cards because they wanted to keep as mementos!

Ipy must have spoken to her while I was chatting with the guests. She stormed past me right after the event. That just shows that just because she wears a tudung, that didn't make her any better a person than me.

Other than that fiasco, the rest of the event went well. As expected, Ipy and I didn't touch much of our food. My dad who was sitting at our table wasn't feeling well. I was left to attend to him while my mother was off chatting with her guests.

He had a slight temperature, but he held on till the end of the event. My brothers went about doing their tasks without any glitch, which was unexpected. I was quite proud of them. My sister did her part too, on top of getting a free makeover from our stylists.

I guess the only reason I put up with the event was seeing my father holding out despite being sick. At that moment, everything else didn't matter. That bitch didn't matter to me. That's Ipy's problem to deal with.

We did have a long talk about it at our hotel. He was surprised at the audacity of all his sisters. He was very much disappointed with them. We both made an agreement that we'll keep minimal contact with certain people. We'll just lead our own lives as best as we can.

Most of the guests stayed till the very end, which was unexpected too. The food was well-received. The cupcakes were given away. The fresh flowers were given away. We were told that almost everyone had a good time.

What's there not to like? Nobody had to prepare anything. Nobody had to clean up anything. Every guest came in their best outfits and left with many photos and gifts. Some even went shopping before and after the event! It was at Orchard Road after all!

Finally this day is over, and everyone can leave us in peace. Not that I don't have good memories of the event. It's just one of those days where I didn't like the attention very much. I guess I'm just not a wedding person.

Last but not least, my sincere gratitude to the people who had made this event possible...

Garuda Padang Cuisine - for the wonderful venue, delicious food and professional staff (Zai was the efficient manager in charge)

D'Glamz Wedding - for the gorgeous makeup and outfits, as well as Ashly and Ryzs' attentive services (more pictures of my makeover in their website)

Anggerik Impian - for the exquisite design and decor at the venue (love the roses and the pearls and the crystal arch. Kudos to Shiddek!)

Perfect Frosting - for the beautiful wedding cake and cupcakes centrepiece.

Park Hotel - for our very comfortable stay right in the heart of Orchard Road.

Tiffany & Co - for their heart-warming service and timeless rings

Soo Kee Jewellery - for their excellent service and promotions (Parkway Parade outlet only)

Raizan's DJ service

Family and friends

Ipy and I tasting the cupcakes


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Thursday, November 27, 2008 @ 10:51 pm

Dear Blogger,

Tonight is my last night as an officially "Single" person. After that, I've to circle "Married" whenever marital status is asked in any of those pesky forms. For some reasons, that just makes me sound old.

Personally, I feel no difference whether I'm single or married. I think, the difference is only felt by those outside Ipy and I. My parents would hopefully lay me off about the marriage bit, but that doesn't mean they'll completely leave me alone. They'll find other issues to interfere with my life.

I basically don't care about my relatives. They can talk all they want, but after tomorrow, they'll only move on to the next person getting married.

Ipy and I would have loved to celebrate our last "Single" night somewhere in town. But I'm not feeling well. I've been under the weather for a couple of weeks now. Stress-related illnesses are not something to take lightly, although I've been quite hesitant to visit the doctor.

Even Ipy is feeling the stress! This wedding has been pretty much a war between me and my family, and much of the time, he was unfairly dragged into this war. He's that much of a people-pleaser.

I have such a strong character and that worries him. Not because he would feel less of a man with me, but because he feels the need to protect me from all the misunderstandings that people have of me. I told him repeatedly not to worry about me, and that worries him even more.

Ipy and I just want tomorrow to be over and done with. It's only a 3-hour event, yet look at the dramas that it has created! God forbid that we have to do this all over again.


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Tuesday, November 25, 2008 @ 8:25 am

Dear Blogger,

I feel very tired and dull. It's as if this wedding is taking a toll on my energy. It's not like Ipy and I are excited about it anymore. This wedding has become more like a party that we both didn't want to attend. In fact, we weren't even thinking about this wedding till yesterday!

My father was discharged last Saturday. I don't know what my mother was told because I wasn't there. When it comes to healthcare, my mother is like those makciks from the kampung. They have their own beliefs on what is good for the patient. They think they are knowledgeable about these things but in fact, they are as gullible as a child who has been given candy.

I have to take my father to the hospital again today for his renal specialist appointment. His kidney isn't functioning well. Unfortunately today, I'm not in the mood to wait for long. The hospital administration still can't answer why bother setting up an appointment when we still have to wait hours to be seen.

Back to the wedding. Ipy and I decided to just let things be. Whatever happens this Friday, it won't be our fault. We've done all we could to make this wedding happen the way we want to. Whether or not people want to turn up, it's no longer our concern.

Even when the kadi has messed up, it's not our problem. The agreement was for him to come at a specified time and since he has taken his own sweet time to come back and tell us that he can't make it, that's not our problem. That is his problem and responsibility.

Religious man or not, that's typical Malay work ethics. After months of registration, he had plenty of time to make the necessary arrangements. Don't expect to make yourself known 2 weeks before the event and say you can't make it.

That said, I won't apologise for being a bitch. Sometimes one has to be a bitch to get things done. I've stepped on so many toes just to ensure that things were done. Even Ipy wasn't spared. If I hadn't harp on him constantly, he'd do everything last minute.

So before I burst an artery, I am going to go on many long solitary walks as possible. Numb myself to as many criticisms as possible. Prepare myself for bigger challenges ahead. Ipy and I will definitely be facing bigger and more exciting challenges ahead!


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Wednesday, November 19, 2008 @ 8:00 am

Dear Blogger,

I spent the whole day yesterday in the hospital with my parents. It started with a routine check-up for my dad. I was only needed there to communicate with the doctor.

Like any other restructured hospitals in Singapore, it's really pointless to make any appointments because you'll end up waiting for hours just to check your blood pressure level. I really don't understand a medical institution's insistence for appointments where it's never on time.

A routine check-up turned into a super long day waiting at the A&E to waiting for a bed for admission. My father's blood test results indicated an extremely high level of potassium, brought on by a possible infection or kidney deterioration. The latter was probably the effect of his diabetes.

Too much potassium in the blood would increase a person's risk of a cardiac arrest. Apparently, the potassium makes the heart beat faster than normal, like a horse's. Thus, a possible heart attack.

We wouldn't know all these if I wasn't a curious cat. During his check-up at the clinic, I asked his doctor why he bruised and bled easily. Whenever I visited my dad, I always see some fresh wounds on his limbs. His doctor wasn't sure so he ordered a blood test.

I never found out why my father bruised and bled easily. But we did find out about his potassium level. We were on our way home when his doctor called about the blood test result. I thought it best that we return to the hospital for more tests to be done on my father.

The A&E is not a place for the impatient. Never ever believe a doctor when he tells you to see him in half an hour. When Ipy joined us at A&E, we were waiting for his second blood test results to confirm the earlier results. After over an hour of waiting to be called, I walked up to the nurses' station and demanded to be attended. The test results were ready 20 minutes ago.

Soon after, my father was wheeled to the observation room. Another half an hour of waiting and the doctor told us that he's going to try to reduce my father's potassium level, which was severely high.

More waiting afterwards. An hour later, I asked the nurse again on what were we waiting for. She said that my father had to be admitted and they're waiting for a bed up in the wards. Then she realised that the doctor hadn't printed the admission documents yet. I could have blown up there and then.

I walked up and down the A&E floor gathering documents and filling up forms here and there. All these could have been done during that hour of waiting! If I had just kept waiting like an idiot outside the observation room, none of these would have been done! How I hate incompetency!

By the time a bed was available, it was almost 9 p.m. My mother and I had been in the hospital since 2 p.m. It was a very long day indeed. A long day of waiting that is! I think 85% of our time were spent on waiting!

When my father was finally up in the wards, it was close to 10 p.m. More forms to fill in. More questionnaires. Another half an hour later, the on-call doctor made his way to my dad's bed. More questions, but nothing conclusive. We dismissed ourselves when my father had fallen asleep.

It's going to be another long day today. I'm trying to catch his doctor on his rounds today. My PSP has been fully charged. The battery died on me yesterday evening and I was left dead bored. I'll bring a book and my crochet in case it dies on me again today.


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Sunday, November 16, 2008 @ 11:48 pm

Dear Blogger,

I hate weddings!!! I hate it more than I hate my menses! Menstruation is already a bane to every woman but I'd relish going through the ordeal every month than to go through a wedding!

Why did I ever bother setting up one for myself? I've always hated weddings, so why did I think that mine would be any different??? I hate the hassle. I hate the fuss. I hate all the double-faced meetings with people all in the name of relationship-building. I hate pretending to be other than myself!

I am so tense right now. Anger and hatred about this wedding is running so deep in my veins that I'm not talking to anyone. I immerse myself in my own little world because that's the only place where I can find stability.


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Saturday, November 15, 2008 @ 9:12 pm

Dear Blogger,

If Ipy and I really had a choice, we would have gotten married anywhere else but here. Just the two of us, with no one else involved. I'm beginning to think that this sounds like a very fine idea.

The bulk of the headache is not with the logistics. It's not with the processes and procedures. The bulk of the headache is in fact, our families' misunderstandings of the concept of our wedding! Our families' simply don't know what it means to have it small!

I'm still very peeved at my mother for going behind my back about the invitation cards. She had the nerve to call my future father-in-law and asking him for additional cards. She doesn't know that I know about it, and my father-in-law doesn't know that I know either.

We have made it very clear to our families that the number of invites are limited. We have no desire to invite the whole village! My mother has already invited some of her friends and colleagues, even though I explicitly told her that I want to invite only family members. I just let it slide.

But when she goes around our backs asking for more invitation cards, that just smacks of disrespect to us. If I had wanted the whole shebang, I would have opted for it from the very beginning. But neither Ipy nor I wanted it! Ipy was actually a little traumatised by his first experience!

Tomorrow, we've invited both sides of the family to meet at our wedding venue. We wanted to settle these nagging issues once and for all. Let them see for themselves why we can't invite the whole village.

Early this morning, Ipy dragged me to East Coast Park for a walk. He didn't say he wanted a stroll. So I walked. With my ankle weights. We walked for about an hour and about 4.5km. I would have kept on walking but Ipy looked like he was about to pass out.

I can't remember what I was thinking while walking. Maybe I wasn't thinking at all. Maybe I just wanted to stay home and play my computer game instead of walking along this crowded East Coast Park.

Oh yes. I'm addicted to "Puzzle Quests". I installed it a couple of days ago, and I've been playing it at an average of 5 hours daily. It's one of those games where you don't have to think of anything else other than the fantasy world you've been sucked into. This game has distracted me of a lot of things and I welcome the distraction.


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Thursday, November 13, 2008 @ 11:49 pm

Dear Blogger,

Who knew that deciding on a wedding cake could kill so many grey cells??? It used to be just about the taste and the design on the cake. As anal as I was, I had to decide on how the cake should be displayed, how the cake should be served, how the cake should do this and how the cake should do that.

And why are wedding cakes so expensive??? I was mentally prepared for our wedding cake to cost about $400-$500 and ours had to cost more than that. Perfect Frosting was highly recommended by my caterer and decorator so we decided to give it a try. I guess quality sure does have a price.

To view other cakes by Perfect Frosting, go to their website.

It seems that as the nearer the wedding day gets (15 days to be exact!), the more annoyingly compulsive to perfection I've become. I've to make sure that everyone does his job, from the caterer to the decorator to even the groom!

I wish I could say, "Thank God I'm only doing this once!", but not many people does "this" once anymore. Besides, I don't want to jinx myself by saying it.

On a different note, we all know how the civil sector works. They're mostly slow to react and incompetent. Ipy received a reminder letter about an outstanding parking notice last month. The funny thing was, we didn't even receive the first notice and on the date, time and venue of the offence, our car wasn't even parked there!

I wrote in to the Housing Development Board (HDB) about the error on the night we received the reminder letter. Nicely of course. We received their reply only last night. See how inefficient they are!

That wasn't all. In its reply, the writer had the gall to say my "appeal" was rejected and they weren't able to waive my charges. I didn't even write in an appeal and I didn't even request for a waiver! All I asked was for them to investigate the matter.

They didn't even acknowledge that they had a mistake! It was so obvious in their letter that the vehicle involved wasn't ours. It was a similar-looking vehicle number. The 4 digits were jumbled.

Of course I wasn't happy! They had made a mistake and the least they could do was to apologise! There were no apology of any kind in their letter at all! So I wrote them a strong-worded letter about their incompetency and bad manners. I made 2 copies, one to the head of the branch and one to the writer itself.

I didn't even request for any special favours this time. Only an apology. Some people might wonder why I didn't just close the matter. It wasn't about pride or money. It was about the principle. We are dealing with a service here. So serve with quality!


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Sunday, November 09, 2008 @ 11:53 pm

Dear Blogger,

Ipy came home earlier than expected again. So many things to catch up and do with him.

Ipy in the plane to don't know where

When he landed in Singapore, it was a day after his birthday. Since he arrived in the morning, we decided to have breakfast at Swensen's at Terminal 2. I know Swensen's offers complimentary ice cream to the birthday boy/girl.

Ipy and Prawn Mee Sua

I had the American Hearty Breakfast

Ipy blowing out his Firehouse Happy Birthday ice cream sundae

Ipy with his 1st birthday present: a pair of Parker pens from yours truly

Ipy with his 2nd birthday present: a limited edition chronograph watch from yours truly

Ipy bought a bike while I was at my sewing class. Now that he'll be office-based here, he thought that driving a car to work won't be cost-effective. With new ERP gantries in the works and ERP/parking/oil rates on the up, I couldn't agree more.

A day (or night) at the Botanic Gardens...

Ipy... aspiring photojournalist

Night view of the lawns at Botanic Gardens

Ipy at Ramen Ten

We had dinner at Ramen Ten, which was alright. What was not alright was the inconvenient paying mechanism that was being introduced. Apparently, Ramen Ten had a 50% discount offer of its sushi menu after 9 p.m. Since we arrived at about 8 p.m. and had already placed an order, we didn't know about the promotion.

We were only told about it 30min before the promotion started. We were also told to close the bill before we can enjoy the promotion. With all the ruckus happening in the restaurant, we didn't quite understood what was goin on. So we just went along.

By 9 p.m., we were already full, but I wanted a last taste of a plate of sushi. After having that last piece of sushi, it suddenly occurred to me that we had already closed our bill! So would we be charged another 10% service charge and 7% GST for this plate of sushi???

My guess was right! Of course I wasn't happy! We only closed the bill before because of whatever gibberish the manager told us earlier. She didn't explain to us that if we continue eating, it'll be a new bill! So I protested!

We got away with a complimentary plate of sushi.


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Wednesday, November 05, 2008 @ 10:05 pm

Dear Blogger,

I foresee exciting times ahead. Not just for the Americans. For the world too! Barack Obama has created American history by becoming the 44th and the first African American president in U.S. history.

Picture from

I had followed the election progress since 7 a.m. on Channel NewsAsia. Not just because that the U.S Presidential Election has always been interesting to watch, but also because I find it interesting to watch the reactions of the American people in general about the election.

One has to admire the Americans for their active involvement in their local politics. Even if they're not volunteers in the party campaigns, they know their stuff! In fact, I was quite awestruck by the level knowledge and confidence from the students of the Singapore American School about the politics back home!

It was just amazing to hear them talk! Most youths in Singapore are like empty barrels. They think they know what's going on around them, but they don't really know. These American kids, or at least the ones who were interviewed, are like a breath of fresh air.

So with Obama's win, will it be sunny days ahead for everyone? I think it's premature to predict anything. He said he's all about change and that he's different. That was why I was leaning a little towards him. Maybe it was an SMU thing (the school has built quite a reputation for being different). But should we be different for the sake of being different?

It would be interesting though to see what his administration can do and achieve. This is of course, on top of clearing George W Bush's mess. Hopefully, Obama finishes the two wars he had inherited from Bush and won't start a new war.

How would the new U.S. president affect me on a personal level? Firstly, I would like to go to the States without being mistaken for a potential terrorist just because I have a Muslim name.

Secondly, I really don't want to live in an extended recession. This won't be a good time for Ipy and I to experience prolonged recession because we are just starting out as a new family unit.

Thirdly, if the U.S dollar is strong, Ipy will be well-paid. That will then have a trickle down effect on me.

Whatever Obama does in his 4-year term, at the end of it all, one thing that will definitely be his legacy would be that, he has proven that anybody can become the president of the United States. Who knows? Arnold Schwarzenegger might be the president next!


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Tuesday, November 04, 2008 @ 7:50 pm

Dear Blogger,

I read with both contempt and sadness in the newspapers today, about the mother and daughter who were sentenced to jail for abusing their domestic worker. Why do these people do that???

Is it not enough that these domestic workers left their family and country to take care of our homes and our family? Even if some of these domestic workers do not get a day off (mostly those hired by Malays), must they be treated worse than cockroaches?

Every time I read about such cases, they invoke memories of when my family had a domestic worker. It was over a decade ago. No, we didn't physically abuse our domestic worker. But I never liked the way my mother bossed her around like some slave. My mother didn't give her any day off either.

She also liked to bring our domestic worker around and made her do the chores in other people's homes. I strongly disapproved of my mother's behaviour, but I was too young then to make any difference.

I wasn't comfortable to let a stranger fold my undergarments. I never thought that was what she was paid for. Actually, we didn't even need a domestic worker! We might be young then, but we were still old enough and capable enough to take care of ourselves.

Since then, I have never embraced the idea of engaging a domestic worker in my future household. If I can manage it, why pay a stranger to do so? It's not like I'm ever going to run a Fortune 500 company anyway. If the situation calls for it, I hope I will not turn into my mother.

Ipy had a theory for this kind of behaviour. He said most people who lived in countries which were colonised before had an inferiority complex syndrome. So when they get the chance to manage over someone else, they lose themselves over the power they held. I thought that made sense.

My mother was always at the near bottom of the pecking order at work. So when she was given the power to manage a domestic worker, she thought she was the queen! Unfortunately, these people forget that these workers are humans too, and they are entitled to human rights benefits.

I truly feel sad for these faux leaders. They are a disappointment to the country, to the society, to their family and most of all, to themselves.

On another note, my diet doesn't seem to be going anywhere. I've almost completely eliminated carbohydrates in my diet. I still eat the occasional potatoes though. I've not eaten red meat for awhile, preferring fish instead. The cooking oil is untouched too!

Yet, my weight's stagnant! What the hell is it waiting for??? Must I do a Karen Carpenter to see some changes??? Maybe I should make myself sick. That usually takes the weight off.

Steamed fish with lots of ginger and garlic

Vegetarian minestrone

Today, it's these 2 dishes. Tomorrow, it'll be cabbage soup. Oh wow! More vegetarian soups!

Oh! Another thing! I managed to get a ring pillow from SooKee Jewellery. When I was at the store last week to get my platinum wedding band engraved, I actually asked the staff about it. He wouldn't give it to me. So I wrote in!

When my email didn't receive any reply after a week, I called them this morning! As usual, calls like these get passed around even though customers spent thousands of dollars at their stores. When I finally managed to speak with one of the staff at the office, I couldn't be a bitch because she was super polite and apologetic.

Eventually, SooKee Jewellery gave me a ring pillow! Apparently, customers who bought a pair of wedding bands get this complimentary gift only upon request, and if and only if the purchase was above a thousand dollars.

Ipy may have not bought a pair of wedding bands, but he did buy me a platinum wedding band and an 18K white gold diamond bracelet. So do the maths! Anyway, a little perseverance and persistence goes a long way. Sometimes, all we have to do is ask.


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Sunday, November 02, 2008 @ 9:11 pm

Dear Blogger,

Busy, busy, busy. It's good that I'm busy. I won't have the chance to be sucked into my thoughts when I'm busy would I? I like being busy. I like the rush of having my hands full with activities.

Not that there isn't any downside. I can do without the headaches. I am still struggling with the seating layouts. I can't figure out why I have more available seats than I should! The totals just don't tally.

As much as I would like to hole myself up in my comfortable abode, I still need to get out once in awhile. I still have outdoor chores needed to be done.

The impact of the wedding season had escaped me. Till now. When I was out at central this afternoon, everywhere I turned, there was some Malay wedding going on. At first, I thought people were still out Hari Raya-ing, until I realised that today was Sunday and the first Sunday of November. In other words, it's officially wedding season!

It doesn't really bother me that the guests made an effort to dress up for a wedding invitation. Especially the women. It's always the women anyway, although I can't figure out why some women would want to look like a walking "Golden Chance" store.

What bothers me is the fuss they make over a wedding! Sad to say, most of the time, the fuss is not good. I couldn't sit in a bus today without hearing a guest bitching about the wedding she had just gone to. It's either about the food, or about the other guests or it could be as petty as the wedding favours. It's just like secondary school and puberty all over again!

The worst I've heard is about how a guest whined about having to fork out the duit salam (Malay version of ang pows). By the looked of it, I think she barely gave away $10 to the couple. I would even bet that what she stuffed in her mouth cost more than $10.

It's not about the amount of money that bugged me. It was her insincerity in giving it! Since when is the duit salam obligatory? I thought it's supposed to be a gift for the bridal couple. So the meaning of a gift includes sincerity right?

Also, I've heard of stories of duit salam conflicts. Like whom is its rightful bearer? The parents or the bridal couple? It's as simple as who is the major investor of the wedding. Unfortunately, sometimes, this rationale doesn't apply here. Some even resort to emotional blackmail just to get this money!

Also, how much to give? The basic rule, I think, is how much is being catered to you is how much you should give back plus more!

That's why, as much as possible, I prefer to give actual gifts that are of equal value. Most of the time, in the form of gift certificates or vouchers.

Some bridal couple would prefer to receive monetory gifts to cover their wedding expenses. I think this is an unrealistic expectation. How often do we hear that the total amount derived from the duit salam manages to make a profit or at the very least, break even the wedding expenses shouldered by the couple? Very, very few.

If a Chinese wedding can't even break even with their generous ang pows, how could a Malay wedding do so? I cannot even begin telling the scary stories I've heard about all the loans taken up by some bridal couples just to host their big day. Stories worthy of frightening anybody into getting married.

No prizes for guessing who gave me this kangaroo key chain and teddy bear with heart (They flew all the way from Melbourne)

Patterns for the dress that I'll be sewing

Ipy bought me chocolates from Melbourne weeks ago, and it's only now that I've opened it. I was on a strict diet and I still am on a strict diet. I only opened it now because I wanted to reward myself for managing to exercise for at least 30 minutes daily, for a week now. I allowed myself to indulge in just one chocolate.

These were unlike Cadbury chocolates. Firstly, it looked too good to be eaten! The one chocolate that I ate, the one with the strawberry-centred filling, was superb! Not too sweet, not too heavy and not too guilty.

Secondly, the sale proceeds of these chocolate boxes go to the Breast Cancer Foundation in Melbourne! This just made the chocolates even more delicious! I think Ipy knows by now, the kind of gifts I like and the kind of things I like to buy. Anything that would help a worthy cause works for me.

Chocolatier... It's pink packaging won me over and the pink ribbon logo sealed it!

Inside the box, there's a bookmark! The bookmark looks so good!

Forrest Gump said "Life is like a box of chocolate, you never know what you're gonna get". In this case, I know what I'm getting!

Voila! Aren't they cute?! The one with the flower is so heartbreakingly adorable to eat!


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Saturday, November 01, 2008 @ 12:01 am

Dear Blogger,

It's now 12:01 a.m. It's the first day of November 2008. It's also the last 28 days of my single hood. Wow! The next chapter of my life is really getting very close! I don't think I'm supposed to be breathing in short breaths right now.

What will I be writing in the new chapter? I don't know. Will it be a long or short chapter? I don't know. All I know is that it will be as interesting and adventurous as my other chapters.

Looking back (or reading back) at my eventful life, I don't regret doing any of them. Some of which I have forgotten (the faces of the men in my past are a blur to me). Some, still vivid as if they had happened only yesterday! If I was given the choice again, I would probably do them differently just to see what the outcome would be.

That is what life is about! Our lives may or may not have been mapped out by divine architects, but how we meet that end is the bigger question we should always keep in mind. Sometimes I think that I have made stupid choices and I dwell on it!

Then I get over them. I reflect on them every now and then because I think they make the best guides for my next destination. But never regret. That's one of my life's philosophies.

"The road of life twists and turns and no two directions are ever the same. Yet our lessons come from the journey, not the destination." Wise words from Don Williams Jr.

After 5 years of blogging, will it stop with this incoming new chapter? Definitely not! 5 years of opening myself up to the world and getting butchered in the process, is somewhat enlightening to me.

One way or the other, my gut-wrenching honesty of my colourful adventures has connected people, both positively and negatively. Which is wonderful! Only through communication will we able to change our world. I see that now.

Ipy understands that writing is therapeutic for me. And through this writing, he's able to get through me. Why I'm angry with him, he learns it here. Why I'm ecstatic, he learns it here. Why I behave in a certain way, he learns it here.

He knows that I am much more eloquent in writing than in person. He also knows that what I've done and immortalised in writing forms pieces of who I am right now. That he chose to be with me still, should no longer be doubted and questioned.

So am I ready to write a new chapter? All I can say is, it'll be interesting.

"Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering." - Jedi Master Yoda.


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