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who am i

Name: modgurl
Location: Singapore

New mom. New woman. Born in Singapore. Raised in the World Wide Web.
Thursday, May 15, 2008 @ 11:09 pm

Dear Blogger,

Nothing drifts a man and woman apart than one's interpretation of sex. Most medical journals dictate that men in general use sex as a cure for all the silly things they do to rile up a woman. It is very caveman-like actually. Then again, a man's intellectual capacity has never developed on par with a woman's since the beginning of time.

On the other hand, women often need to be emotionally intimate before we can engage in physical activity. And this is usually done through verbal communication. Once that is not met, men may have more luck winning a bingo game than getting laid.

So what happens when women withdraw from intimacy? It just means than men have messed up again. What men don't realise is that whenever they fucked up, women feel insecure. Men are supposed to be protectors, therefore adjectives such as strong, dependable, proactive, assuring are automatically associated with men!

So if they fucked up, what other species can women turn to??? Ignore all that gender equality progress our fore mothers have accomplished in this argument. In the core of our vulnerable bodies lie a deep-rooted belief of what the roles of men and women are!

I am hopelessly vulnerable during sex. Because for one to get to that stage with me, he has to break so many layers of brick walls that I've built as protection over the years. So imagine after all that hard work of getting through that wall, he suddenly put a brake on the physical connection. How the hell did he think I would feel???

How can I not feel wounded, confused, cheap even?! It's a rejection unworthy of any forgiveness. That just means he wasn't even sure of himself, and that insecurity resonates hundred fold to me. A part of my trust in him has shattered. As trust is already a fragile element, it will take time and faith for it to recover.


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