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who am i

Name: modgurl
Location: Singapore

New mom. New woman. Born in Singapore. Raised in the World Wide Web.
Friday, February 22, 2008 @ 11:35 pm

Dear Blogger,

Why We Love Who We Love
By Dr. Joyce Brothers

"While the mother determines in large part what qualities attract us in a mate, it's the father--the first male in our lives--who influences how we relate to the opposite sex. Fathers have an enormous effect on their children's personalities and chances of marital happiness.

Just as mothers influence their son's general feelings toward women, fathers influence their daughter's general feelings about men. If a father lavishes praise on his daughter and demonstrates that she is a worthwhile person, she'll feel very good about herself in relation to men. But if the father is cold, critical or absent, the daughter will tend to feel she's not very lovable or attractive."

Hmm... That explains why I tend to have low self-esteem often. It's all daddy's fault!

"Robert Winch, a longtime sociology professor at Northwestern University, stated in his research that our choice of a marriage partner involves a number of social similarities. But he also maintained that we look for someone with complementary needs. A talker is attracted to someone who likes to listen, or an aggressive personality may seek out a more passive partner."

Hmm... Aggressive and passive. Is Ipy passive? I know I'm aggressive.

"When men and women possess a particular asset, such as high intelligence, unusual beauty, a personality that makes others swoon, or a hefty bankroll that has the same effect, some decide to trade their assets for someone else's strong points. The raging beauty may trade her luster for the power and security that come with big bucks. The not-so-talented fellow from a good family may swap his pedigree for a poor but brilliantly talented mate."

What did I trade my assets for? What are Ipy's assets?

"Is there such a thing as love at first sight? Why not? When people become love-struck, what happens in that instant is the couple probably discovers a unique something they have in common. It could be something as mundane as they both were reading the same book or were born in the same town. At the same time they recognize some trait in the other that complements their own personality."

Love at first sight eh? More like a blinded, polluted sight what with all that smoke from the satay grills and cigarettes from a long table of guys at Lau Pa Sat!

On a grievous note, my mother was involved in a reckless driving accident near SIA Cargo Complex this afternoon. She and her colleagues were waiting for their buses when some idiot driver lost control of his speeding car and crashed onto another vehicle. The collision railed off the road and hit not just my mom, but two other colleagues too!

All the ladies were sent to CGH A&E. Fortunately, my mom only suffered minor abrasions and shock. Another lady suffered shock too. The third lady had to be admitted though, but nothing too serious.

The timing was impeccable, horribly as that may sound. I was almost about to knock off from work when my brother tried to call me repeatedly. We didn't know much then, so I thought it was best that everyone stayed calm and not raise any alarms.

I meant, we already are five siblings. That's more than enough to cause a ruckus without complicating the situation with our extended families. Until we know for sure of the outcome, keep the situation under control within ourselves. That's what I believed.

Maybe it's the way general Malay families function. I don't know. Whether it's birth or death or in between, everyone within a two generation radius has to be present. Nothing wrong with that (I'm keeping an open mind here). But does your third cousin or your grand-aunt have to swarm the hospital lobby because you fractured a finger???

Please let the doctors and nurses do their job! Pester them with your questions AFTER they've found out what's wrong with the patient. Geez!


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