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who am i

Name: modgurl
Location: Singapore

New mom. New woman. Born in Singapore. Raised in the World Wide Web.
Saturday, January 12, 2008 @ 8:46 pm

Dear Blogger,

I've exhausted myself asking people out to chill with me tonight. Once again, I still don't know why I expect better of the people in my contact list. Perhaps it's time I let them go. If they don't make any effort to keep in touch with me, then why should I? Why should I torture myself silly like this?

I guess, friends are like shoes. They are useful for awhile, but should be discarded when worn out. Then it's time to get a new pair of shoes. Decluttering shouldn't be just for the books, papers and mails on my desktop. I should also declutter the social aspects of my life.

Ipy and I have been having heated discussions lately. About us, the wedding, the future, kids... you know! It seemed like he has his life all planned out. Whereas for me, I'm in limbo. I can neither move here nor there until the preceding task can be completed. It's agonising at best!

I don't know why he loves me so much. I wish I could give the same amount of loving he's been showering on me, back to him! He was right you know. I've too strong a character. I'm intimidating because people find it hard to penetrate through the fortress I've built around myself.

I can't help it. That's my way of protecting myself. For every scar I receive, a brick is added onto that fortress. I guess I must have built quite a formidable fortress by now, because I feel like it's an uphill battle for me to receive love.


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