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who am i

Name: modgurl
Location: Singapore

New mom. New woman. Born in Singapore. Raised in the World Wide Web.
Tuesday, April 04, 2006 @ 11:07 pm

Dear Blogger,

When did we lose our child-like wonder? When did we become an adult? What does it mean to become an adult anyway? When did we forget to have fun? These days, being an adult is such a bore and I don't want to be a bore! I want to be young and live life to the fullest!

But I can't. Why? Because I have to be an adult. I have to do things that I don't like doing because I have to be an adult. Most kids want to quickly grow up into an adult because they think that being an adult allows them more freedom. I don't remember wanting to grow up fast. Unfortunately, I did grow up fast. Too fast.

At the end of my 9th year, I was already developing breasts. At the beginning of my 10th year, I was trying to get rid of all the hair that was growing at places which I thought shouldn't even be there! At mid-year, I began to live a cursed life as a woman.

By the time the nurses came to talk to us about puberty and menstruation, I was already past that. Do you know how awkward it was to be the tallest and most developed student in class? A year before, the boys in class were boys I held hands with during assembly. A year after, they were not just boys. They were kids!

At home, I was already taking care of my siblings while my parents went out to work. I thought it was so unfair that I had to feed them, changed them, educate them and entertain them at the same time. I was sister, part-time mother, tutor and clown all at once! While girls my age were playing dolls, I was changing diapers for real.

Strangely though, I never learned to cook. I can wash, clean, mop, sweep, iron, wire the electrical circuit, tune the radio, VCR and TV, and knit! But I never learned to cook! I've cooked stuff but that's purely out of desperation. As long as it's edible, I've no complaints.

Perhaps now that I'm going on 30, I guess I'm trying to make up for lost time. I particularly enjoy adult games but whatever I do, I want it to be fun! I don't expect to live long anyway. Just look at my dad! He's not even 50, yet he's partially immobilised.

I don't want to end up like my dad. I don't want to be in that position where I'll find myself too late to do the things that I want to do. I want to explore Europe, the Americas and all ancient worlds! I want to experience passionate sex with men who are traditionally out of my league! I want to volunteer my expertise in war-torn countries! I want the world to relinquish prejudice of all sorts!

By the way, I watched "Real Women Have Curves" last night on HBO. I just want the whole world to know that, I LOVE MY BODY!!! Fats, cellulites, scars and all! Although I wish I've bigger breasts, I think my ample butt and killer curves make up for it. Also, I've gorgeous lips and an awesomely radiant smile. So what's not to like about me???

Sincerely,
modgurl.

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