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who am i

Name: modgurl
Location: Singapore

New mom. New woman. Born in Singapore. Raised in the World Wide Web.
Saturday, February 11, 2006 @ 11:24 pm

Dear Blogger,

I didn't have lunch nor dinner today because I didn't have any money. I only had instant noodles for breakfast. I tried to will away my hunger while working. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't. I was tempted to ask Din for money and to fetch me from work. I hadn't done so. Yet.

I don't know how long I can take this. Not the hunger, but this whole situation with my dad. I'm expected to help out financially, but I'm burdened by my own financial troubles. It's not even mid-month and I'm already broke! What shall I do? What can I do?

Sometimes, I feel like giving up, but I can't! I have to be strong! I have to be calm and patient! But I'm weak!!! I'm fragile!!! I'm not superwoman! Will I be OK? I keep telling myself that I'll be OK, but I feel like I'm lying to myself. I feel the box closing in on me again. I want to cry in the dark corner. Just like when I was a child, I would cry under the bed, in the company of dusts and cobwebs.

Sincerely,
modgurl.

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