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Sunday, March 30, 2014 @ 10:55 am
Six Packs and Sex
Forewarning: This is a picture-heavy and sexually-suggestive post.
As you can guess from the title, this post is about the movies I've watched recently with hubby dearest. Yeah... now he's hubby dearest. The blockbuster season (by the way, the season starts earlier every year, doesn't it?) has officially started with the release of 300: Rise of an Empire and Captain America: The Winter Soldier. Both are sequels to smash hits, although 300: Rise of an Empire isn't really a sequel if you know the story.
Hubby and I first watched Captain America: The Winter Soldier last Thursday, opening day. The day before, it only received three out of five stars in The Straits Times review. I trust The Straits Times movie reviews. The reviewers and I usually share the same opinions about movies. Since it only got three stars, I didn't expect the story to be like The Avengers or even Iron Man 3. Thor 2 was a disappointment, but I closed one eye to that for the delicious Chris Hemsworth.
When Steve Rogers aka Captain America came on screen, first thing I thought was his body looked so fake. I'm not into those beefcake, muscular, bodybuilding body types. So I thought Chris Evans swallowed too much steroids to get that body shape. He didn't look like this in The Avengers.
Chris Evans as Captain America
Hubby on the other hand, thought his body was a motivation. I doubt hubby dearest will ever achieve that inspired body in my lifetime. Anyway, the movie was alright. Captain America was my least favourite Marvel superhero, because he was too straight. He's down there in the list with Superman. I loved Black Widow though. Watching Scarlett Johansson in that tight bodysuit and kicking butts was worth the price ticket. She sure has a dangerously bootilicious pair of humps!
The more exciting movie which I watched was 300: Rise of an Empire. No matter what critics said about the original 300, I liked the movie. Not every movie must be smart. Once in awhile, I like to watch soft porn. All that half-naked men with Fabio-like bodies running around in a feature film, that's like watching soft porn. Besides, the effects were great, the soundtrack was great and the battle scenes were vicious. It's testosterone through and through. I like!
It's sequel, or not really a sequel, amped the blood and violence. The naval battle scenes were the best I've seen. My only disappointment was that Sullivan Stapleton aka Themistocles was no Gerard Butler aka Leonidas. I haven't even heard of Sullivan Stapleton and I had to google his name even now. Granted, Themistocles was no Spartan (he was Athenian) and he was more politician than warrior. But Gerard Butler had that man-ness about him. Maybe it was his thick Scottish accent.
Sullivan Stapleton as Themistocles
The original 300 with Gerard Butler
Even in the super-duper intense and hot in the crotch sex scene with Artemisia (Eva Green), he didn't do it for me. It was Artemisia who I wished I was fucking! And that Botticelli boobs! Don't be surprised. I already know deep down I'm bisexual.
Themistocles and Artemisia negotiating a truce (seriously!)
Eva Green was awesome in the movie. She WAS 300: Rise of an Empire! She was vicious, manipulative, commanding and of course sex on legs. This was a part she was born to play! Angelina Jolie is still my number one girl but I don't mind having both of them together in bed. What? I never said I was a nice girl.
Vicious Eva Green as Artemisia
The result of watching these two macho movies? The sex afterwards. It's not how Artemisia would have done it, but at least I'm having it. Three nights in a row! More please!
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